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Bert Decker – You’ve Got to Be Believed to Be Heard: The Complete Book of Speaking . . . in Business and in Life!

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Book Description

Are you uncomfortable—even afraid—about the prospect of speaking before a group of people? Do you have trouble getting your message across? When you speak, do others listen, or can you feel their attention wandering?

Effective communication is essential in business and in everyday life. The most powerful communicators reach not just our minds, but our hearts: They win our trust. You can learn to impress and persuade people by following Bert Decker’s program in You’ve Got to Be Believed to Be Heard

Decker trains over 10,000 professionals each year in the art of communicating. In this book, he distills his expertise into a fresh new approach to speaking, with examples and how-to exercises that anyone can follow. You’ll discover how to win the emotional trust of others–the true basis of communicating in any situation–and these tips:
• How to conquer “stage fright”
• How to inject dynamic energy into your voice
• Why eye contact helps win trust
• When and how to use humor to make a point
• A proven technique to eliminate “Umm” and “Ahh”
from your speech
• Eight steps to transforming your personal impact

Book Review for updated version from…
Bert Decker’s revised edition of  You’ve Got to Be Believed to Be Heard was one of many books recommended by Six Minutes readers last year.

Now I know why.

Decker’s public speaking classic is a comprehensive book which deserves to be on your public speaking bookshelf.

This article is the latest of a series of public speaking book reviews here on Six Minutes.

There is much to like in Decker’s book. To keep this review shorter than the book itself, I’ll focus on the three parts of the book that stand out the most for me.

1. Emotion and the First Brain
The first half of the book establishes the case that effective communicators (Decker describes these as New Communicators) understand the importance of emotion in the communications process. That is, communication is more than logical arguments. More than facts and figures. More than metaphors and triads.

Decker explains the importance of emotion by reasoning that our brains are composed of two parts:

   The New Brain – the intellectual part of the human brain which reasons and processes at a conscious level, and
   The First Brain – the nonreasoning, nonrational, subconscious, primitive part of the brain.

The First Brain, he argues, acts as a powerful filter. Before your message can even get to the New Brain, it must first pass by the First Brain. For that to happen, you must connect emotionally.

2. Communication = Leadership ?
Decker asserts that communication and leadership are intimately linked. He clearly reasons that to effectively communicate is to be a leader; to be a leader is to effectively communicate.

Decker is not unique here. I, too, hold the belief that communication and leadership are joined at the hip. However, Decker is so persuasive on this point that, as I was reading, I began to wonder whether leadership and communication are actually the same thing. Are they really separate concepts at all?

3. Speechwriting and Delivery Tips Abound!
While the first half of the book is somewhat theoretical, the second half is packed with practical tips for speechwriting and delivery.

Here are just a few of the public speaking issues addressed by Decker in You’ve Got to Be Believed to Be Heard:

   Eye contact,
   Posture and movement,
   Dress and appearance,
   Vocal variety,
   Word selection,
   Fear of speaking,
   SHARPs (Stories and examples, Humor, Analogies, References and quotations, Pictures and visual aids), and
   A comprehensive speech organization method he names The Decker Grid System.

These tips can be found in other books or blogs, in one form or another. The great value here is descriptions offered by Decker, and the relationships he makes between them and the concepts introduced earlier in the book. For example, Decker offers insights into public speaking fear drawn from the First Brain concepts.
What Could be Improved?

I loved this book, but it’s not perfect.

   Is emotion ignored in traditional communications training?
   Decker claims that the role of the First Brain (that is, the importance of emotion in communication) has been “virtually ignored by communications experts”. While I concede that many traditional public speaking books underestimate the importance of emotion, I think “virtually ignored” is overstating it. For example, one of the oldest books on the topic of public speaking — Aristotle’s On Rhetoric –  recognizes emotional appeals as one of the three primary forms of persuasion. Aristotle’s lessons have may have been skewed a bit, but they are not ignored.
   Slow start
   When I read a book for review, I mark the page whenever there’s a key insight or a golden quote. In the first 75 pages of this book, I only marked two pages. By contrast, I marked 15 in the final 150 pages. Those first 75 pages ran through a large number of politicians, business leaders, and celebrities, and labelled them as either old (bad) or new (good) communicators. The analysis isn’t superficial, but I still would have liked to see deeper analysis here to demonstrate the positive and negative communication traits. It’s difficult to do this, however, in print… perhaps this book needs a companion DVD?

Thank Netvicar for the link!


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